Tag: #poem

Lost hope

 I'm strange here
 I want to see the boy
 Which will free me
 Cold down my powers
 Balloons of words are flying
 All lost dreams
 There is a beautiful mirror
 Every door is closed
 Only one is open
 When I see them, I'm pale
 They are wide open 
 Ragged sheeting in them
 Whole barred ...
 and bowed promises!
 23:25 16/05/03

Not my name

 I feel like a doll
 My life is washing in a washing machine
 Yes, without living without moving
 I'm lying in a golden powder
 They treat me like a puppet
 Like a passing haze
 Such a doll at the exhibition
 In a copper frame
 'Porcelain doll'
 What fate her given?
 22:04 15.05.03

My war

 Some pain, some sorrow
 Some arrow in the heart
 Some glow and sun heat
 Broke into me
 Another morning is coming today
 Another evening is going down
 I'm spinning round
 Not feeling happy
 Around plenty of enemies
 A lot of not stepped on thresholds
 I am alone
 I was framed 
 I think I can't stand it much longer
 I cut out stupid pictures of paper
 The soul and the body are broken
 Probably defeated by them ...
 Body ... and the soul broken
 It's probably already defeated by them
 23:51 12/05/03

Future

 I'm sitting and watching
 Bending over my fate
 I don't know what's going on
 When it's going to be morning and the cock will crow
 What will happen to me?
 Will the sun rise for me once more
 In general unaware
 Everyone is full of enmity to me
 I'm not making it anymore
 I'm keeping up
 I don't have strength anymore
 To wash out from here
 I want to finish it
 Go away
 And they'll probably call me a coward
 But I won't stand on the way of risk again
 Because I can't carry on
 12:18 12/05/03

Fear of now

I don't know what fate is preparing for me
Life is plotting against me
I feel alone, alone
In this world little, poor
I'm afraid of everything now
I stand on the crossroads to hell
I don't desire a lot
Friends have gone
Fear has power over me
The highest price from me wanted
I want to sleep
And cuddle a teddy bear
00:30 12.05.03

Why

Why all my dreams ...
 ... bring me to a boil?
 Why I can not ...
 ... and my dreams are going so slowly?
 No friend ...
 ... makes my sadness deeper!
 I really don't care anymore ...
 ... because everything in my head is cut with a knife!
 I was awaiting help....
 ... I was stupid to expect it!
 Now I don't want anything anymore ...
 ... because it's all a joke!
 I'm not expecting anything ...
 ... because everything is filled with evil!
 So I'm going from here ...
 ... I do not know yet where.
 But I will have a think ...
 ... and my soul will not tell anyone!
 09:40 12/05/03

It’s all painfull

 Every scar, even small
 Stayed in my heart with sadness
 I suffer from all this
 It has hurt me like thorns
 I'm afraid of tomorrow now
 I almost got called a faded painting
 They think I'm crazy
 One day I'll fall on a corn patch
 Because I'm different than they are
 But slowly I'm sinking in an envy's lake
 10:00 12.05.03

This feeling, these feelings

 Next step
 Next shock
 What is waiting tomorrow?
 Why is it so slow?
 I've had enough
 I'll go somewhere there
 I don't want to be anymore!
 I don't want to live here!
 Everything from every side
 All old houses
 Everything is mauling me
 Everything is against me
 It wants revenge on me
 Make jokes out of me
 I don't know what for...
 What I have done...
 09:10 12/05/2003

Revenge

 I'm loosing my will
 Because nothing works out
 Everything ends on nothing
 My goals are soaked in hate
 I'm trying to fight it 
 Making plans for the future
 But I lack the strength
 Because I am choked with human's jealousy dust
 ... but I will do my things
 Before I will die
 They will regret
 I will not have mercy anymore
 22:30 08.05.03