Tag: #depression

Depression

 Skull mine broke
 My face faded
 Blood everywhere
 I think of mine
 Cry away
 Have moment of love
 Swim below the waves
 Jump above the field
 This is all I want
 All for what I swear
 Woman in a cape
 Her face whole swollen
 From her eyes whole tears
 And all bad moments in day light
 She’s craving in pain
 She’ll never forget them
 September 2009

Little rain

 Warm...
 The fragrant rain
 His tiny droplets
 Similar to the needle
 Floating on the cheeks
 Dripping on my hair
 Catching flies falling
 Such innocent, sweet
 Like small fishes
 He's like me
 Sometimes a little cool ..
 ... again, something on cheek passes
 The second of my life runaway
 The blood flies
 Hades is spinning
 And I can go
 And bite the ground
 Nothing keeps me here
 And I don't know how much more my soul can take
 I am above the earth
 My thoughts are boiling
 I will never regain consciousness
 I don't know if I'll ever feel a little joy
 I don't know what they say
 I am lost in it
 I lost the thread
 And I don't know where the beginning was
 22:25 20.05.2001

Lost

 I don't know anything anymore
 And I don't want anything anymore
 Only get far away
 Somewhere where birds are singing
 And the leaves from the trees gently fall
 Because I lost my orientation already
 In my thoughts I'm lost
 I don't know what's good? What a bad
 And everything I see is insipid
 I've got my dreams taken away
 My desires got stolen
 I was left with nothing
 Hm ... everything, wanted something
 Now nobody, nothing
 Just me
 ... I want to runaway
 And I don't know anything
 I don't want to know anything anymore ...
 23:22 19.05.2003

Fear of now

I don't know what fate is preparing for me
Life is plotting against me
I feel alone, alone
In this world little, poor
I'm afraid of everything now
I stand on the crossroads to hell
I don't desire a lot
Friends have gone
Fear has power over me
The highest price from me wanted
I want to sleep
And cuddle a teddy bear
00:30 12.05.03

Why

Why all my dreams ...
 ... bring me to a boil?
 Why I can not ...
 ... and my dreams are going so slowly?
 No friend ...
 ... makes my sadness deeper!
 I really don't care anymore ...
 ... because everything in my head is cut with a knife!
 I was awaiting help....
 ... I was stupid to expect it!
 Now I don't want anything anymore ...
 ... because it's all a joke!
 I'm not expecting anything ...
 ... because everything is filled with evil!
 So I'm going from here ...
 ... I do not know yet where.
 But I will have a think ...
 ... and my soul will not tell anyone!
 09:40 12/05/03

It’s all painfull

 Every scar, even small
 Stayed in my heart with sadness
 I suffer from all this
 It has hurt me like thorns
 I'm afraid of tomorrow now
 I almost got called a faded painting
 They think I'm crazy
 One day I'll fall on a corn patch
 Because I'm different than they are
 But slowly I'm sinking in an envy's lake
 10:00 12.05.03

Tsarist courier

 These are my dreams ...
 Desirous of fulfillment
 And that's all
 It's all fake!
 It is not worth anything!
 It was supposed to be so ...
 It was only a pain ...
 I am not allowed to dream!
 I am not allowed to live!
 Sorrow is remained
 Happiness not by inch
 Have I made a mistake?
 I will go away!
 My tears are falling
 And lost dreams
 This is my life
 And you will free me
 From this ...
 ... everything bad
 Shroud of love
 No joy

Insane pain

I want to live the rest of my life 
Without beating ... without beating 
I wants to live the last moments 
As it is possible , most pleasantly ... 
I want to recover  
What I lost 
I lost somewhere 
What I miss 
What evil people received 
What I miss 
What  I am now cursing for 
I'm not planning anymore 
For everything I regret 
I still feel the lack 
I feel some taste 
I lost that something 
Which makes me angry 
You want my tears 
I don't listen to these theses 
Because they are stupid 
From them my I get headache